THE Old Man’s wish to all ” Happy Thanksgiving”! You dumb ass Turkeys!


                                      November 28, 2013
Thanksgiving message from who else.
lewis1946@cox.net

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  Thanksgiving often only see it at its face value – a great excuse to eat plenty of food and to appreciate everything that we have. But there is much more to this crazy holiday and the stories and history behind it are definitely worth remembering. Here are some interesting facts about this traditional holiday that you might not know.Including today’s turkeys, Obama has pardoned 10 big birds. According to the Washington Post, he has pardoned 40 human beings as well!
I’ve lost my Love, my Family and my health. Now I’ve lost my dog. As Pat would say “Where Is The Next One Coming From?’.
Sometimes it does feel like when it rains, it pours.
I’m afraid that the Thanksgiving holiday as is  Christmas coming up is not going to mean a lot this year or any other years as in the past.
boo hoo , how many of these losses were your fault? all those things can be replaced. if you are alive , semi healthy be grateful. Death is the one thing we can’t fight back from. So, all you feel bad jack-offs think of that!
We know that Thanksgiving was first celebrated by the pilgrims, and we know that Squanto had something to do with it. But what about the pies and the feast and the booze? What’s the deal there?
They probably didn’t have turkey, and if they did it was wild, not the type we’re used to inhaling. This is good news for those of us who would rather pass on the dry, sleep-inducing bird. The bad news is that rather than turkey, the crew feasted on the internal organs of local deer. Mmmmm, harrowing.
Yeah, it’s not likely the Americans even invited the tribes who helped them survive to eat with them. If anything, they offered them food as payment and then crossed themselves in fear for their lives having made direct contact with their rescuers.
Approximately 45 million other turkeys are eaten on Thanksgiving in addition to yours. Though that might seem like an awful lot of turkey; surprisingly enough, according to the U.S. Dept. of Agriculture, that number only represents 33 percent of the turkeys sold every year.

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“Gobble, gobble” actually translates as, “Hey baby, looking good…wanna go out sometime?” in turkey language. Incidentally, only male turkeys “gobble, gobble.” Female turkeys make a clicking sound.
Americans consume well over ½ billion pounds of turkey every Thanksgiving.
A class of third-graders were asked to write what they were most thankful for. Jessica wrote, “I’m thankful I’m not a turkey.”
Think you have it rough imagine feeding 140 people for 3 days! The first thanksgiving was comprised of the surviving 50 Pilgrims and 90 Wampanoag Indians. This was definitely an endeavor because there were only 5 surviving women. Just imagine the amount of food that would involve and cooking trying to keep that many men well-fed for three straight days.
Things You Can Only (safely) Say at Thanksgiving

         Talk about a huge breast!

Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

It’s Cool Whip time!

If I don’t undo my pants, I’ll burst!

Whew, that’s one terrific spread!

I’m in the mood for a little dark meat.

Are you ready for seconds yet?

It’s a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

Just wait your turn, you’ll get some!

Don’t play with your meat.

Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.

Do you think you’ll be able to handle all these people at once?

You still have a little bit on your chin.

How long will it take after you stick it in?

When the little thingy pops up it’s ready.

Mmmm, moist meat.

I’m stuffed!
As this is my wish to all of you family types and my wish, you all have a great Turkey Day! From all that I read on face book, I am not the only one eating mac & cheese and chicken from Tyson’s. No, I am not unhappy as so many take these holidays for. In fact really happier when alone and enjoying NO PEOPLE and that even means families. So, Nick, Michael, Jess and many others I join you in enjoying our Thanksgiving as it is today.
           

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